3-665.52.06 Episcia cupreata
Clades: Asteranae, Lamiidae, Lamiales, Gesneriaceae, Stage 06.
Introduction
A young woman, hiding herself, looking at things form her hiding place; she desires attention but does not have the courage to ask for it; suddenly she is at the center in full attention, singing acting and dancing, which she likes, but fears then. These states alternate.
They feel that communication will help, will prevent obstacles. But there is an inability to come into communication.
Mind
Desire contact, communication, connection, but it has to go smoothly.
Mistakes when not engaging.
Not heard.
Desires smoothness, control.
Aversion roughness, prickliness, obstacles, conflicts.
Sometimes one has to agree to disagree.
Postponing.
Getting late, postpone, due to obstacles.
Challenged.
Challenge of affective communication.
Avoiding conflicts.
Unsure, introverted, pulled in, < not being heard.
Not engaging because of unable to communicate, to hear, pulling back.
Apologizing.
Adapting, in order to be heard.
Hope, that thing will turn out right.
Body
Ear: tinnitus; deafness.
Mouth: taste spicy, mint like, watery, a little of everything, salty, spicy, bitter, sweetness.
Themes
The challenge of effective communication.
No power to communicate or connect.
The challenge to be heard; connected.
The right moment to communicate.
Feeling challenged and needing the cooperation of others to reach the goal.
The challenge of give and take.
Adapting to avoid conflict.
The problem is not engaging and difficulty in communicating. The resolution is listening understanding, and validation.
Body
Tinnitus.
Hearing sensitive.
Hearing dulled.
Ears stuffy.
Nose running.
Blowing of nose.
Yawning uncontrollably, loudly.
Tired from listening.
Background
Episcia cupreata, or Flame violet as it is commonly known, has dainty, tubular flowers that rise above the foliage and are typically red, but may also be found in orange, pink or yellow. They flare out at the tips like trumpets and are sometimes fringed at the edges. Deep in the center of the trumpet is a yellow eye. This lovely plant has showy leaves that grow in a rosette and reach 2-3 in (5-8 cm) long. They combine shades of green and coppery brown, often with light green or silver veins. Leaves have a metallic-like sheen and grow in the tropics and in temperate regions as houseplants, primarily for their attractive foliage.
Sources
http: //www.guide-to-houseplants.com/flame-violet.html.
Wikipedia.
3-665.52.06 Episcia cupreata
Proving: trituration proving, Bocas de Toro, 24-2-2016.
The proving is written as it unfolded from C1 through C3.
Master Prover: Jan Scholten.
Pharmacist: Robert Muntz.
Supervisor: Sally Williams.
Provers: Prover 1: Female, age 33; Prover 2: Female, age 54; Prover 3: Male, age 52.
C1
Prover 2: It is a kind of wave and sound from the ocean, but it is too much for me today. It is not comfortable to hear it. I prefer to not hear it and to be in the garden so I can concentrate.
Prover 3: The surf is not rolling and relaxing. It is loud, it is like…. BOOM!.
Prover 1: I was talking about flamingo with U. It is like a crashing of waves. Like the stomping of her heel and her dress flinging around, it like the wave and the stomping is the crashing of the wave.
Prover 1: I tried to tell U. the story and she cut me off and I could not tell her the story I was wanting to tell her. You would think water would be a good conductor of communication, but no.
Prover 2: The sea is in the ear today, it is like a trumpet.
Prover 1: I was trying to speak to U. today. I thought she would appreciate it. Trying to connect and I was not connecting and it was frustrating. I had a beautiful story to tell her. Trying to have a connection and it is not supposed to be happening and getting rejected, you feel unconnected. And being connected is THE most important thing. Nature and people. And not being connected is like being an outsider. Lonely. You retreat and go further in.
Prover 3: L. and I were trying to communicate. She was listening to me and I was talking to her and we were not connecting. L. was like, we are not connecting at all. We had not seen each other for 3 days and we were excited to see each other and we could not connect. I need to make more of an effort to make sure we were communicating. Like last night, we were getting ready for dinner. I was getting out wine glasses and there were stem glasses and short glass and I chose the short glasses. Then she was in the cupboard getting the wine glasses and I said honey I have the glasses and she said no we need wine glasses and I was like, I have glasses and she was like no we need WINE glasses and I am like, I HAVE THE GLASSES!! It was frustrating, but it only lasted a minute. It was frustrating thinking you were communicating and you were not.
Prover 1: I felt rejected. I am learning a lot the last few days and I am trying to figure it out. I feel like I have to close off. I have a lot to offer and you can’t give it if the other is not receiving it.
Prover 3: But maybe it is not the right time.
Prover 1: I tried to tell U. the story twice and I couldn’t. Miscommunication or the timing is off. I had something to offer and I felt that it was not the right time. I know I will be able to communicate eventually.
Prover 1: There is a prickly edge to the leaf. I wanted it to be smooth and it was prickly! Just like the communication.
Prover 2: Misunderstanding and the communication is not so successful. F. and I are having a hard time exchanging our money. It is not the money, it is the emotion.
Prover 2: You have to do it, to exchange the money. It is his responsibility to plan everything and it is not going smoothly and he is pressuring me to be quiet. He wants to protect himself. So he organized it all (the trip) and I want it to flow, but I do not know what is happening. It is a mistake for me not to know what is happening. There was a misunderstanding and he was disappointed. It is not the money, it is the emotion. And he tries to put me down. You cannot do this to me. I need some time to feel the emotion and go through it. He already had time to go through it, he came from the town after he tried to exchange the money and had the time to work through the feeling. But he puts me down. He is protecting himself from being criticized from me. We do not have good harmony.
Prover 2: This trip was spontaneous. It is always H. and F. and I never come. H. says you can come! I did not manage any of it. So I have to follow. For me I do not trust them! It is a bad situation. I feel bad to see you (talking to the supervisor who organized the proving week), we owe you money. I know what is comfortable for me. It is no problem for you, but I want to close this chapter. It is very uncomfortable. I am in another condition, I keep quiet most of the time. Passive not active. I need a view of the whole. It is my mistake. I am part of this and now there is a disturbance between the two of us.
Prover 2: At the beginning of this trip F. made the mistake of booking the plane tickets for the wrong day and then he had to pay to change it. Then the second time he got H’s name wrong on the plane ticket. Three days before we were to leave, H. noticed it. H. would have had to stay home! Then we have to change it and he had to pay another 100 euro to change the ticket. He never read what was printed. He totally trusted it. We trusted and there was one mistake after another and with each change it cost more money, but it is not a money problem, it is an emotional problem.
Prover 1: I got chills. I am getting so frustrated over the time clock, why is this so hard right now. I cannot get it to work. Just like I am incapable of connecting, I want to do it, but there are obstacles. Cannot communicate. Right now it is the last thing I need, I need something to go smooth. It is overwhelming, but it is a small task and it should be easy. It is like having a self-worth and having worth in the group. I have things to offer. I like to help and there are all these obstacles and I am not being as helpful as I can be.
Prover 3: Challenges and frustrations. We have been talking about the trip for quite a while. L. made most of the travel plans. I have had a passport for thirty years. Friday afternoon before we were to leave the next day I realized my passport had expired 2 years ago. I applied a lot of positive thinking. I rebooked my ticket, S. found that I could get a flight to Bocas Tuesday morning. I had looked just before and there was no flights! It was more money and Delta wanted more just to change the ticket, but they waved that, but there was hotel expense. It was frustrating. We have traveled so much and it was a silly oversight, but I might not have made it!.
Prover 2: We too travel a lot and everything goes wrong this time!.
Prover 3: It is frustrating and challenging, but you learn a lot. You learn to make sure the passport is good, that the tickets are the right day, that the names and passport numbers are correct. You learn about more communication to address it before, proactive instead of reactive. I try to be proactive and have a plan. I always have the “what if” question in the back of my mind. But conversely, I want to be more spontaneous! Just without that much oversight! The challenge turned out positive. I could not even entertain the fact that it was not going to work out, but in that task I could only do so much. All I could do was all I could and then all I could do was hope others would help me. That they would do their part to help me and then it would be successful.
Prover 1: The leaves feel prickly and I want them to be smooth. I do not feel comfortable. An uneasiness. There is miscommunication and little tasks are difficult……. there is a wall up. What can I do to make it any smoother? I do not want prickliness, just smoothness. I should be able to do this and it is not working.
Prover 3: Things that are in my control, but they spin out of control. It is simple things we have done before, but for whatever reason they are challenging. Routine, but they end up being non-routine, because they are so challenging.
Prover 1: It is the frustration. My desire to communicate and to connect to feel helpful. I feel a lot of worth in being helpful.
Prover 2: I do not make the plan and to not think about it and so I did not ask him. I use to do it all and this time I feel helpless. Then I say something, I cannot help to get us out of this difficulty. Bad things happen, it is not dangerous or harmful, but it is disturbing emotionally. I did not take the responsibility for myself, I relied on someone else and then I am disappointed and angry. If I made the arrangements I would be happy, but it is not as joyful as it should be. The frustration is not just on my side, but his side too cause of the mistake.
Prover 3: L. did the scheduling, but it was a team effort and there was no blame involved.
Prover 2: I would not have told these stories. It was personal. I would not have told anyone, I would just have kept it between the two of us.
Prover 2: Now the sea is no problem. In the beginning it was hard on my ears, but not now.
Prover 1: I feel like if I have a question I need to write it down and ask it later. I feel I do not want to impede anything. I want to make things smoother. This morning I tried to talk and I was blocked. I’ll just talk later. It is happening like that lately. I have something to say and maybe it is not the right time. I want to be connected, to share something that would bring them joy and then you are stopped. Your value to the group. I postpone and then it makes me unsure. And now I am antsy.
Prover 1: I would love to prove an animal. That would be so wild. Something with a heart. A wild boar or a guerrilla. Would that not be crazy!! The heart, it is a connection. The feeling of connecting with the animal. Find that animal and look into its eyes.
Prover 3: If you could prove an animal what would it be?
Prover 1: I do not know. A wild boar. I have no idea why. A parrot or a bird.
Prover 2: The money thing makes me want to avoid you (speaking to the supervisor). I feel bad. F. tries to turn against me, then it hurts me more. I should give the money to you, but I can’t. You have done nothing, it is me and then my relationship is disturbed. It is not good to give and not get back. It is not equal. If I give, I do not feel weak and small. I feel you are higher because you gave, it is not in balance it is not in harmony. Like you will look down on me. I have to keep away from you but you did nothing! I feel hurt from S. but she did nothing, so I have to hurt! I am not free in communication because we are not equal, because I have to give something and I cannot, it is out of my control.
Prover 3: Like a debt and you owe someone something.
Prover 2: He made a mistake. I did nothing and H. did nothing and he gives us the feeling that we did something wrong. He reacts too much and he is in a weak position and if I say a word it hurts more. Both sides are hurting. You are free because you gave, but the relationship is disturbed because the one that owes is hurting and is disturbed.
Prover 2: Like a good friendship. They do something that is unfair. Or they give and they say it is no problem and they forget and they are free, but for the other what has happened? It is okay you do not need to pay me back, but the other feels disturbed. They start to withdraw and then they act strangely. Why is she acting so strange to me? I am hurt, but I did nothing. He has to keep a distance because he knows there is no harmony in the giving and taking. So you go to the friend that you gave to and talk. Give me your friendship, it is worth more to me than the money. That is more important, a good friendship, but the nature of friendship is you can never give and take equally.
Prover 3: The best solution is recognize what is the imbalance and then have a conversation. My friendship is more important than a book or money.
Prover 2: The emotion from the heart is disturbed and you then cannot get the real heart from your friend.
Prover 3: I had a real life experience with this. The simple version is a relative had a cafe and I learned how to roast coffee for the cafe. My mistake was that I did not bill her on a regular basis. In my mind it was easier to do it when the bill was bigger, but for her the bill was too big for her to pay. Then the cafe went out of business and she owed me 2, 000 dollars. She is a close and dear friend and I made up my mind that money was not going to wreck the relationship. She acted a bit different. We both knew she would not be able to pay me back. If you can, cool, but if you cannot, it is okay too. The relationship is good, but knowing her and her family I know it still bothers her. I cannot feel the change in the relationship, but I know it is there. They went through a difficult time in their personal life and they had a lot to go through with money and the emotion that is connected to it. On the surface we understood what had happened. The only way to get back to the way it was would be to pay the debt, but we love and care for each other and we are tight.
Prover 1: (Weeping.) I have a feeling I have to adapt, I have to change. To get along with the group. Adaptability to communicate. More and more I am just listening, you have hushed me twice (speaking to the supervisor) because someone else was talking and I have to adapt. Growth comes in phases. I have a lot inside that needs to come out. I have to postpone. It is so unsettling. I do not feel I am where I am supposed to be. I have to stay back. Being hushed is like being stunted in my growth. I know there will be a time for me. If I wait I will get my time and then I will be able to communicate to make the connection. I feel good now being able to say this. It is very settling to communicate. Thank you for hearing me!.
Supervisor’s observation: Prover one had difficulty finding an appropriate time to communicate. When she wanted to speak to U. to tell her her story, she picked a time when U. was upset about misplacing her cell phone and could not listen to her that moment. The two times I had asked her to wait with a comment were when one of the other provers was in the middle of a statement. On each occasion she felt suppressed in her ability to communicate and felt she needed to wait for the “right” time to express.
Prover 3: I was hot and now I am very comfortable.
Prover 3: You get your thoughts and words out. But it only feels good if they hear you and understand, but if there is a disagreement your thoughts are not being accepted. You then have to agree to disagree. Compromise. That is the best you are going to get.
Prover 1: But you still feel heard.
Prover 3: I think it is black and you think it is blue and that is not going to change. Then you have to accept it or not. Then you are frustrated.
Prover 1: I can agree to disagree as long I am heard. The goal is to be heard.
Prover 3: The compromise does not damage the relationship, it is the communication. Not communicating or not being willing to listen.
Prover 1: My nose is stuffy from crying.
Prover 3: In my daily job I have to talk to people. I work for the Army Corp of Engineers and I have two roles; one is reviewing permit applications for projects that will impact a natural water system, and then I am a regulatory cop. If someone has done something to their land that affects a wetland then I have to contact them and make them get a permit or they have to remove the project. They may have put their life savings into a project and you tell them they have to stop the project because it is affecting a wetland of the US. Then the negotiation starts. The path to be authorized or permitted and resolution can be step one of many. The goal is to have the project authorized, but a lot of times they do not want to listen to what I have to say. Then the challenge begins. If you cannot have that communication you are not going to get anywhere with them. From the public sector, if they do not want to deal with Corp of Engineers they will put up a wall. If they do not answer phone calls or respond to letters, then the Corp can take legal action. It is frustrating because I need to make things right and I do not get the opportunity to do that. It is not a sense of failure, you did everything you could. They have to cooperate.
Prover 2: My ears are stuffy, I am listening to you, but I do not hear you. I am out of the communication now and it is frustrating. Runny nose. Blowing nose.
Prover 3: The other challenge is initiating communication when it is going to be difficult. You cannot get a resolution if you do not try to communicate.
Prover 2: Loudly yawning.
Prover 1: I adapt because I do not want the conflict. No one wants that. That is foreboding. Is there going to be a conflict?
Prover 3: That is want is challenging for me. To be in a place where you have to communicate with conflict can be difficult.
Prover 2: I am out of this. Yawning tired and nose running. Now I am withdrawing. I am not being moved inside. I could not follow you. It is too much for me. I do not want the hard work of listening to you. I am not interested in the story.
Prover 3: I get that a lot! (laughter!).
Prover 2: I am impatient. F. always wants to tell me these stories. I am like oh and I try to concentrate, but I get tired and I go away and he says “Are you here? Do you hear me??” I am the listener all the time. You want to tell your story, but I do not pay attention. He has so many ideas. I want to be heard, but I do not want to hear. I do not want to hear from the other. “Are you listening to me??” It was a problem with the three of us in Panama City. H. and F. talk at the same time and they do not listen to each other.
Prover 1: When you see the problem in the communication it could be the job, friends and family. My partner my husband. I need the communication to be there. I feel really peaceful right now. It is the communication.
Prover 1: I feel we are communicating really well and that makes me happy. We have all said and we have all been heard. And it makes me peaceful and happy and makes me thirsty for wine! Like happy hour. Everything is going so good!.
Prover 2: I feel a short tinnitus.
Prover 3: I have it all the time. I think it was loud music in bars and concerts for years and years. It is annoying. A constant high pitch ringing. It interferes with sleeping and focusing and concentrating and in communicating with others. Never peace and quiet. It makes me a poorer listener. It impairs my ability to listen. I have to strain to listen. In the noisy environments it is harder for me to communicate, so I then withdraw because I cannot be part of the group.
Prover 1: It is an obstacle and I have to adapt to the situation. You come back to the communication. You ask the question and the communication is clearer. The method is to ask a question about what they are saying then you can be certain they have heard you and you are certain you have been heard. It goes smoothly then, fluid, and the communication flows. It shows that I am interested. If I am not interacting then the communication is not as good.
Analysis of the Remedy code
3-665.52.06.
6; Angiosperm.
6; Lanthanide Series/Asteranae.
5; Silver Series, Lamiidae.
5; Phase 5: Lamiales, the desire to communicate.
2; Sub Phase 2: but no power.
06; Stage 6: Taking on the challenge, initiate, forced.